At The Armory (A Skit By Louie)

Yesterday, I was inspired by Gomer Pyle, Bill Engvall, and North Georgia College to write the following skit...

At The Armory
A Skit Written and Copyrighted 2006 By Louie S. Williams, Jr., NGC '86

THE SCENE: The armory at North Georgia College. Two young freshman cadets, Privates Gomer D. Frogg and Spitt N. Polisch, are there.

(Gomer approaches Spitt, who is busy cleaning his weapon on the cleaning table.)

Gomer (once he's stopped): "Hey, Spitt! Are you cleaning your weapon?"

Spitt: "Nope... my first sergeant ordered me to check all the weapons in the armory and make sure that this new cleaning brush fits in all of them."

Gomer: "I'm sure glad my first sergeant don't make us do things like that."

Spitt (sarcastically): "Well, Gomer... your first sergeant must be a great guy."

Gomer (with a big grin on his face): "Shoot yeah, Spitt. First Sergeant Hardcore is a really nice feller. Why shoot, he even wanted to know if I shined my helmet every night. I told him I did... and it just put a biiiiiiig ol' grin on his face, I tell you whut. Why, it just warms my heart to know that I put a little sunshine in First Sergeant Hardcore's life. He's a real nice feller, you know... a little gruff sometimes, but a really nice feller just the same."

(Gomer just remembers that he's late for his Basketweaving 101 class at Dunlap Hall.)

Gomer: "Oh, I better run... I'm late for Dr. Frankenbean's basketweaving class."

(Gomer turns and runs toward Dunlap Hall.)

Spitt (yelling): "Hey, Gomer?!"

Gomer (as he stops and turns toward Spitt): "Huh?"

Spitt: "I forgot to give you something."

(Gomer heads back toward Spitt.)

Gomer (curious and somewhat excited): "You got a present... just for me?"

Spitt (with a smile on his face): "Yep, sure do... here it is."

(Spitt hands Gomer a sign saying "I'M STUPID!".)

Gomer (with extreme enthusiasm): "THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!! That's the nicest thang anyone at North Georgia College has ever done for me! I'll wear it with pride... oh by the way, my first sergeant said that there's going to be a blanket party in his dorm room tonight and I'm gonna be the guest of honor. You wanna join us, Spitt?"

Spitt (curtly speaking): "Sure thing, Gomer. Bye."

(Spitt rolls his eyes and goes back to cleaning his weapon as Gomer takes off toward Dunlap hall.)

DISCLAIMER: Although the setting for this skit was North Georgia College, it is not based on any actual incident or individuals. Any resemblance to any individual is purely coincidental.

Hope y'all had a great Christmas and that y'all have a very happy and prosperous 2006.

Thanks for visiting and please come back again.